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I heard the clicking noise on herdigital camera."Give me that camera!" I said."Sally please persuade, what shall we call her? Charlotte Lapute? No,that's not right. She's a maid and doesn't need a surname - Charlotte itis! Please persuade her to sit down." That's right, Charlotte, you are learning. Sally hold his head straight.Dawn go and get your make-up bag. It's time for your makeover Charlotte!" No way, I am not wearing make-up!" Stop being such a baby Charlotte! You should really be wearing diapers! Right, we will do a deal. Make-up is worn by all of the women in thishouse. You are presently wearing underwear which you would normallyexpect to see on (a) a man or (b) a woman? Yes I can see you have workedout that you must wear make-up." Also Charlotte you would appear, by your choice of underwear, to haveabdicated your role as man of the house. Whenever you put on femaleunderwear you will wear make-up. If however, you chose to put on maleunderwear you do not have to.. "And now, I must sleep," I said. I got up and headed straight for the couch.I heard Terry ask, "Are we going to practice tomorrow?" but I don't think I answered.I don't remember anything between then and when Mary shook me awake for Christmas dinner. "Dinner's ready, Artie." Just hold the pillow over my face until I quit moving." Come now." Mary took my arm, tugged me up, and herded me upstairs. I ducked into the bathroom for a couple of minutes.I still felt sleepy. When Mom saw me enter the kitchen, she asked in a scolding tone of voice, "Were you asleep all afternoon?" Yeah, I didn't sleep much last night." He was dead to the world when we were down there playing pool," Rich said.Mom shook her head. "You're going to mess up your sleep schedule." I have no excuse, ma'am," I said."Smartass," Mom said."Agnes, Agnes," Aunt Kate said in a rueful tone.Mom thumbed her nose at her and then grinned. She said to me, "I hope you aren't going to go around like a tranquilized sloth all evening.".
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